It Happened In Degrees
by littlestkitten
Summary: It had happened in degrees. Yuri could never pinpoint when things had changed, but he knew it had not happened all at once, or, as the saying goes, overnight. Conrad/Yuri


Title: It Happened In Degrees

Author: Littlestkitten (saratu on lj)

Fandom: Kyou Kara Maou

Pairing: Conrad/Yuri

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 778

Notes: For the prompt "degrees". It started out with that theme but it sort of deviated after a while. Oh well. This is my first KKM fic, so hopefully I've got their characters down alright. Please tell me if you find any embarrassing mistakes. Thanks.

It had happened in degrees. Yuri could never pinpoint when things had changed, but he knew it had not happened all at once, or, as the saying goes, overnight. He couldn't say when it happened, but he knew how. Piece by piece, like a puzzle he could only figure out in his dreams. He couldn't say when things had changed, but he could say when he noticed the changes.

Like the day he had emerged from the fountain, dripping wet as usual, and there was Conrad waiting for him, smiling as usual. And while his being happy to see Conrad wasn't different, the way his heart seemed to stop for a minute was. The way he could hardly concentrate on anyone else, even when Wolfram was shouting in his ear, that was different. He didn't understand what exactly it was he was feeling but he knew that Conrad had become even more important to him. And he couldn't help but wonder when that had happened, and why hadn't anyone warned him it could?

The next time it had been at night, when he was trying to ignore Wolfram's snoring. He had been thinking about Julia and what it meant to have the soul of such a beloved person. And suddenly it hurt deep in his chest when he thought of Conrad and how Yuri was only alive because his beloved person was dead. And it wasn't like Yuri had never had these thoughts before, or that he'd never felt pain because of them, but before it had been a general pain, focused on all the people who had loved Julia, not just on Conrad. In that moment, Yuri couldn't live with the idea that Conrad only wanted to be by him because of Julia. He spent the rest of the night trying not to cry over something that had never bothered him as much before.

And suddenly little, every day things started bothering him as well. The way Conrad never seemed to mind when Yuri was dragged away because of duties or a jealous fiancé. Yuri started wishing that Wolfram wasn't the only one who would get jealous over him, that he wouldn't mind if occasionally Conrad would stop being so perfect and show some feelings for him beyond that of a loyal servant. The word "heika" became something he hated to hear and he found the usual exchange between him and the man-who-named-him no longer a familiar comfort, but an unbearable discussion. Found himself snapping at the man with none of his usual good humor.

After all this he was more surprised at the fact that he _was_ surprised when he found himself dreaming about Conrad. And not the usual nightmares about being abandoned or betrayed, but dreams that left him panting and sticky and thankful that Wolfram was such a deep sleeper. His dreams didn't leave him during the day and he found himself thinking about Conrad more and more. If he didn't concentrate he would watch the man's lips instead of listening to what he was saying. The others start noticing his distraction and Gunter almost gave himself a fit worrying about a possible illness. Yuri knew the others were worried about him but he didn't know what to do about it. Letting the dreams come at night made him feel guilty, like he was stealing something that wasn't his, but trying to stay awake left him distracted and weak toward daydreams during the day.

He took to wandering the corridors at night and wasn't all that surprised to find Conrad doing the same thing. The man appeared to take his duties way too seriously and Yuri wasn't surprised that Conrad would insist on patrolling the castle himself. After nights of little sleep and all the dreams he'd been having Yuri could hardly blame himself for doing the most idiotic thing ever and kissing the man. Although, he did worry that maybe it had been a little rude to kiss him in the middle of a sentence.

But the look on Conrad's face and the feel of his slightly chapped lips against his own had been worth it. And the way Conrad seemed to melt against him when they kissed the second time was definitely worth it. The way those strong arms shook as they pulled him forward was something he was sure he would be haunted by in his dreams. But at the moment he was beyond caring about anything. He just wanted this moment to last, just wanted to forget about the existence of everyone else and the fiancé sleeping in his bed. This was his, and he'd waited long enough for it.


End file.
